Keep Those Cousin Connections Alive!

 

As 2023 winds down, I've been updating my cousin connections. I don't want to lose track of these relatives in the coming years! How I wish I had inherited something like this. My Mom's handwritten 1960ish address book was as close as I got to such a listing, except she didn't explain any relationships.

I maintain a digital document so I can sort alphabetically if I'm looking for a particular set of cousins or if I want to search the entire document for specific words/dates. My notes column lists the exact relationship and any other pertinent details. Don't forget maiden names, nicknames.

My Sis now has a copy of the updated version so she's aware of our cousin connections on both sides of the family tree. We've met many of these cousins in person, but others we've only "met" via email or phone. 

As a new year's resolution, please do yourself and your family a favor and create or update a listing of cousin connections. To make it easy, go ahead and borrow or adapt my format, which is also in my popular genealogy book, Planning a Future for Your Family's Past.

"Cousins" is Amy Johnson Crow's genealogy prompt for week 51 of her #52Ancestors challenge for 2023. 

Looking Ahead to 2024 Genealogy Priorities

Well, 2024 is nearly here! It will be my 26th year of genealogy obsession, I'm happy to say. Also, 2024 will be my 16th year of genealogy blogging.

In the coming year, my priorities will be:

• Create a family history photo book about my husband's paternal grandparents. This is likely to be the longest and most detailed of my photo books, because I have a lot to share (research, photos, stories) about James Edgar Wood and Mary Slatter Wood, and their siblings. I'll blog as I work on it.
• Continue writing and posting bite-sized bios of ancestors. Some bios I've already written form the basis of content in my photo books...and vice versa. Over time, I'm posting brief ancestor bios on WikiTree, Find a Grave, Fold3, FamilySearch, MyHeritage, and more.
• Switch old photos from archival sleeves to safe, convenient photo albums, a project that fell to the back burner in 2023. I love working on old photos when there's a big snow storm outside. So if January in New England turns out to be snowy, my photo project (including captioning) will gain momentum.
• Continue redoing research on focus ancestors, as new info becomes available and as I try different sites. In 2023, I learned how my husband's maternal grandparents met, by researching the social columns in newspapers that only recently were digitized. More of that in 2024. Also, I love learning more about in-law ancestors. Sometimes researching them gives me a clue about a direct ancestor OR gives me context for understanding family dynamics of the past.
• Slim down and reorganize surname file folders. I'm slowly pawing through my surname file folders, consolidating/digitizing research notes, tossing unneeded paper (like printed-out census pages). This is another wonderful snowy-day activity that usually sends me down a rabbit hole as I follow up on something I forgot about or didn't understand the first time I saw it.
• Genealogy programs, education, connections. I'm still making presentations, still taking webinars, and will be attending some local genealogy meetings in 2024. Most important to me, I'm keeping alive the cousin connections I've made in my years of researching family history. 
• Saving family history in institutions. I still have a few items from family history that I'll be donating to institutions in 2024. More about that in upcoming posts. 

Dear readers, I wish you a new year of peace and a tree full of genealogy fun!

No Heirs for Your Family History? Ideas, Part 1

One big reason I wrote Planning a Future for Your Family's Past four years ago was to provide ideas for curating a family history collection and preparing it to be passed to the next generation. The concept struck a chord in the genealogy community -- and my book has been selling steadily ever since.

My book didn't explicitly address what to do if you have no family heirs to take over your genealogy collection, although many of the ideas in the book do apply. 

Today I'm beginning a new series of posts with ideas about possible paths forward if this is your situation. The goal is to keep your family's history from winding up in a garage sale or dumpster. The new year is a great time to begin thinking about what happens to your genealogy--before you join your ancestors! These ideas are meant as starting points for your own plan to protect family history.

NOTE: If you're considering finding a non-family home for your collection as a whole, please read this informative article about the process before you make any changes to your collection.

Idea: Try to coordinate with relatives

Whether you are in touch with nieces, nephews, 1st cousins or 1st cousins once/twice removed or 2d cousins (on either side of your family), you may be able to find someone or more than one relative willing to accept at least a few of the key items in your genealogy collection.

Often, nephews/nieces/cousins are willing to accept a gift of a group family portrait that includes their parents/ancestors as well as yours. Maybe you have such a portrait from a family wedding or reunion. Even if the photo was fairly recent rather than decades in the past, ask whether your relative would be kind enough to take possession of your [hopefully good condition] original for the sake of future generations. 

If you know a certain relative was especially close to your mother or father or a grandparent, consider approaching that relative with the request to safeguard some or all of your family history collection. At the very least, your relative may be willing to accept photos/documents related to part of your shared family tree.

If nothing else, a cousin or niece or nephew who appreciates the value of family history may be willing to take some (or all) of your collection and hold it for their heirs to avoid having that info lost to future generations. 

Idea: No cousin left behind

Also coordinate with relatives to protect photos and documents related to ancestors who had no direct descendants. It's possible that a few relatives could agree to share the collection of these ancestors. 

That's how I ended up with the wedding portrait and childhood photos of my 2d cousin Iris, shown at top of this post. She had no direct heirs; her collection went, by default, to her 1st cousin. That cousin held onto the bulk of Iris's photos but asked me to take a few key items because of my interest in the Farkas family's genealogy. She also shared a few photos with another cousin who remembered Iris with great fondness.

Now a selection of Iris's photos will live on with my heirs, labeled and captioned so future generations understand who she was and how she was connected with my grandma Minnie Farkas's family. I want them to at least know Iris's name and her smile, even if they never knew her in person.

Idea: China or silver? Offer one place setting at a time

If you have your own fine china or silver (or an ancestor's tableware inherited in the past), consider asking relatives whether each would accept a single place setting. One setting doesn't take up much space and it would keep the tradition alive in a different household--multiple households, ideally. 

In my extended family, a niece and a cousin accepted a single place setting apiece from an ancestor's tableware, just for the uniqueness and the tradition. Mix and match is in style, remind the younger generation! 

FOR MORE IN THIS SERIES: Please see Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4.

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"Beginnings" is my #52Ancestors post for Amy Johnson Crow's 2021 challenge. 

McClure Cousin Bait on FamilySearch

Cousin Bait on Family Search 

I married my husband for his ancestors!

His many ancestors left photos, genealogical paperwork, diaries, newspaper clippings, and more. Lucky me!

Thanks to cousin L, the Wood family historian, we know a great deal about the Wood side of the family. My late father-in-law Edgar James Wood (1903-1986) had five Mayflower ancestors.

Cousin Bait on Family Search

So far, we don't have connections with too many McClure cousins--those related to ancestors of my late mother-in-law, Marian Jane McClure Wood (1909-1983).

Now I'm adding cousin bait to my husband's McClure ancestors on the Family Search family tree. See the screen shot above of some McClure ancestors and how I've begun personalizing their profiles on Family Search.

Personal Photos = Cousin Bait

Because Family Search has only one collaborative tree, any researcher who comes across these personal photos will see me as the source.

I'm easy to contact via Family Search (my email contact is up to date). And since Family Search is free, I know a lot of people use it for research and documenting family trees.

Sometime soon, I hope McClure cousins will get in touch after noticing the personal photos I posted on ancestor profiles.

Watchlist of Ancestors

Also, I'm "watching" other McClure and Larimer ancestors to see whether other researchers post any personal photos or other personalized details. Then I can check the source and contact those people, offering to share info.

Here's a watchlist of 7 people I'm watching so far on Family Search. I take a look every so often for any changes or photos posted to these ancestors, hoping that I'll connect with a few more McClure cousins.




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Thanks to Amy Johnson Crow for this #52 Ancestors prompt of "cousins" for week 38.

Family History Month: Noting My Cousin Connections

Among the sample templates and forms on my blog is a simple table for keeping track of all my cousins. As shown above, I record the names of my cousins, contact info, and notes.

Until last year, I felt I didn't really need a formal listing. Then I nearly forgot to tell one new-found Farkas cousin about a mutual cousin I had located months before. (With the permission of both cousins, I shared their contact info and they have since met in person.)

A reader just asked whether I note all my cousins or only cousins who are interested in our family's genealogy. My answer: I note all my cousins. The notes section indicates when I last spoke with each and whether I requested or received family history info, but that's not as important as compiling a complete listing of who's who among my cousin connections. In the distant future, after I join my ancestors, I want relatives to be aware of the many cousins we have and how to connect with them, should they wish.*

Of course, as my DNA research continues, I hope to be adding more names to my ever-growing list of cousin connections. And by noting names of cousins, it helps the genealogists of the future to understand exactly who's who in my family tree.

*This is one of the many tips in my book, Planning a Future for Your Family's Past, so that the next generation doesn't lose touch with their cousins.

Here's to Cousins

This week I've talked with two of my cousins. One is the genealogist of my maternal grandmother's family, a smart researcher who gets things done through a combination of online resources and helpers at the local FHC. She's recuperating from a broken hip and has had to put genealogy on hold for now, but we've been enjoying our discussions about the process of genealogy, not just the vital information she uncovers. We learn from each other and laugh a lot at the twists and turns in the genealogical road.

The other cousin has been a wonderful source of details that helped me investigate new branches of the family tree. She's not involved in genealogy but she welcomes the opportunity to talk about our common ancestors. Unfortunately, she has no photos to share, but she does remember family stories and has a very keen mind. If not for her, I would know nothing about my grandfather's siblings. And I'm delighted to get to know her and hear about her daily life.

So here's to cousins! Long may we be connected and talk about all kinds of things, not just family history.

Staying in touch with newfound cousins

When it comes to staying in touch with newly-found cousins, how often is too often? I'm connected to a couple of cousins via Facebook and post or send a FB note every other month to say hello if I haven't heard from them. I exchange e-mails with a couple of other cousins about 3-4 times a year or so. One cousin I call every few months to say hello and update her on my genealogical adventures. And of course I send ("e" or snail mail) season's greetings and new year's wishes to all my cousins. I've even met some cousins face to face! 

One cousin on my husband's side, an avid genealogy researcher, is in touch every couple of weeks; it's a real pleasure to hear that family's news, or share in the latest family-tree expansion, or at least get a "hello." Even if I receive only a forwarded joke now and then, I'm glad to be thought of and considered part of the family circle. 2022 update: This researcher and I are still in touch and we often share info, as well as updates on our own families!

Probably few relatives remain as excited about renewing long-lost family connections as I am, although most are delighted at the outset. Everybody's busy these days, with work or family or hobbies or just the details of everyday life. 

How often is TOO often to be in touch? I'm not just looking to fill out the boxes on the family tree. I'm genuinely interested in staying in touch and learning more about my family members, sharing memories of our mutual ancestors and enjoying the genealogical adventure together. 

What are your thoughts on staying in touch with relatives you've recently discovered in your family research?