No Arranged Marriages for the Farkas Sisters in America

 

My maternal grandma, Hermina "Minnie" Farkas (1886-1964), insisted on marrying the man of her choice. She met her future husband (Theodore "Ted" Schwartz, 1887-1965) in a Hungarian delicatessen in New York City's Lower East Side, an immigrant neighborhood packed with tenements and pushcarts. Minnie (born in Hungary) lived on East 6th Street, Ted (also born in Hungary) lived around the corner on Avenue D. Although Minnie's mother thought Ted was a "peasant" and not good enough for her, Minnie found ways to see the man she loved. 

What happened next is legend in my family: Minnie's parents tried to arrange a marriage with a man they considered more suitable. When this man came to the Farkas apartment with an engagement ring, Minnie threw it out the window. Her younger brothers ran downstairs to find the ring. What became of the ring? Nobody knows, but Minnie made her point. Her parents finally accepted her choice. Minnie and Ted were wed at the Clinton Street Synagogue in 1911, a few months after Ted was naturalized.

Where Minnie's sisters met their future husbands

Minnie showed her Farkas sisters that women in America could choose their own husbands. Here's how those young ladies, my great aunts, met their future spouses:

Irene (1896-1988) met farmer's son Milton one summer when she and her mother spent a couple of weeks boarding at his family farm in upstate New York, where they escaped the heat of Manhattan. Irene worked as a bookkeeper and was very much a city girl, but Milton's good looks and charm won her heart. They married in the Bronx and lived for a year or so with Milton's family. They then moved to the Bronx, a greener borough than Manhattan, where their two daughters were born.

Ella (1897-1991) went to college to be a teacher. She met civil engineer Joseph through her friendship with sons of neighbors. The couple married in the Bronx, had a son and a daughter, and the family remained tight-knit and happy until Joe's untimely death. Ella had never stopped working, a rarity among her married sisters, and she taught elementary school until her retirement.

Freda (1898-1989) also was introduced to her future husband Morris through the same neighbor boys who were friends with Ella's fella Joseph. Freda was a librarian when she met and married Morris, an actuary in insurance. They had two sons. During World War II, Freda worked at Grumman Aircraft, the only Rosie the Riveter among the Farkas sisters.

Rose (1901-1993) worked as a stenographer and bookkeeper. She met accountant George at an adult summer camp outside of New York City, and they married in Manhattan. Rose and George had three children. George went back to school for a law degree and opened a successful tax law practice. Rose was one of the matchmaker aunts who later got my mother and my father together on a blind date!

Jeanne (1905-1987) was a bookkeeper for a jeweler in Manhattan and although one of the owners proposed, Jeanne chose Harry, a dentist she met at an adult summer camp. Jeanne and Harry were married at a big wedding during the Depression. The entire family began to have their teeth cared for by Jeanne's hubby.

"Love and marriage" is this week's genealogy prompt from Amy Johnson Crow's #52Ancestors series.

Bite-Sized Family History from World War II

It seems my relatives like to learn about family history in small doses. Not for them a big data dump about dozens of ancestors or multiple generations. Keep it focused, keep it simple, they'll pay attention for at least a little while.

This week, I created a bite-sized photo book with snippets of what some ancestors did during World War II--in the military and on the home front. (Photo of photobook will be posted soon!)

Many served in the armed forces. I selected four to profile in some detail: my Dad (US Army), his brother (US Army Air Corps), my aunt (WAC), and my uncle (US Army). Lots of photos and bits of documents brought their stories alive.

I also briefly touched on the military service of Dad's and Mom's first cousins, including one in the US Navy and one in the US Marines Corps. Another of Dad's cousins served in the New York Guard. Nearly every branch of the armed forces was represented in the family tree, and mentioned in the bite-sized book!

Supporting the war on the home front

Beyond the military, our Farkas family had its very own Rosie the Riveter. My great aunt Freda, younger sister of my Grandma Minnie, worked long hours in the Grumman aircraft factory on Long Island. 

Other women in the family tree were supporting the war effort on the home front, as well. My Mom and her twin, plus two cousins, joined the American Woman's Voluntary Services, volunteering for a range of activities including selling war bonds. 

My maternal grandma's Farkas Family Tree association often held war-bond sales during monthly meetings, raising a couple thousand dollars at a clip. Mom was also involved with New York City's civilian Air Warden Service during 1943, checking that curtains were closed for blackouts in case of overnight enemy bombing raids. 

Does your family tree include any Rosie the Riveters? Women's History Month is a great time to show pride in these ancestors by telling their stories in a bite-sized family history project.