Tuesday, April 13, 2010

"The less said about it, the better"

I've been transcribing letters sent to my Mom during the 1930s and 1940s. It's been exciting to read about my father's whirlwind courtship of my mother, from the viewpoint of friends writing in response to Mom's letters about the developing romance. Sarah, a close friend since the 1930s, was a good correspondent, and her letters to Mom are full of everyday stuff that we descendants wouldn't otherwise know about. The latest movies, a bit of politics, how's the family, etc.

I'm working on letters from late 1945. WWII is over, and we all know that the men returning from service were eager to get back to regular life again. Dad, ten years older than Mom, was certainly ready to settle down. Meanwhile, Mom had been saying that all the best guys were in the service--and finally they were home! Apparently an aunt set the two of them up, they hit it off, and then...

Dad is first mentioned in letters to Mom in mid-October, 1945. They had a few dates and eventually kissed, and things got really serious on both sides. A letter from friend Sarah, dated December 18, 1945, says: "The fact that he's really falling in love with you is the best news yet."

A letter dated December 21, 1945, refers to Dad negotiating a big business deal, and Mom's friend Sarah adds: "For I am sure that it will not be long after that wedding bells will be ringing."

Finally! A letter dated January 4, 1946 refers to Mom and Dad being engaged. Enclosures haven't survived, which is especially sad since the February 2, 1946 letter from Sarah to Mom starts out:

Darling! I was so thrilled to get that announcement. Even though I already knew, and expected the card, when I read "engagement of," I was thrilled to the core.

On the other hand, Sarah was such a close friend and confidant that in her letter of February 9th to Mom, she writes:

I was quite taken aback by your news regarding the wedding. I guess I don't have to tell you how I feel about it. The less said about it, the better.

Wait a minute! Here's where speculation sets in. I suspect that Mom's friends were urging a quick wedding, but my parents set a wedding date for late in 1946. One letter mentions something about "can you wait till April?" and another says "if the event takes place in June..." Is that why "the less said about it, the better"?


  1. Oh, isn't it hard not knowing the details?! Don't you wish you had your mom's letters, too?! Is there anyone alive who can shed some light on this? I hope so.

  2. Nancy, I've asked my cousins about this but they simply don't know . . . I can speculate forever! Guess I have to accept that this is a small mystery I won't ever solve.

  3. I wonder if this had to do with money or financial problems?

  4. BzIzzi, I bet you're right. Who would have paid for the wedding? Maybe Mom and Dad had to save up to pay for the McAlpin reception?